Kiss Off: How We Use Our Mouths On The People We Love

Kissing

by Matt Lurie

A man and woman once told me they no longer kissed because “they had better things to do.” The man and woman were Stephen and Amy, my girlfriend Elizabeth’s parents.[1] Elizabeth, who sat with us at the dinner table, said she couldn’t imagine it—not kissing.Continue Reading

To Divide is Not to Take Away: My Life as a Polyamorist

polyamory 4

by Matthew Pridham

In the Beginning—My Poly Predecessors

I blame the Bible.

This is the response that runs through my head every time I’m asked how I became a polyamorist. It is a snarky answer, the sort of thing one trots out in order to be provocative of either thought or a nice juicy argument, but there is some truth to it. I was born into a family and a sub-culture saturated with all things Biblical. Characters such as Jacob, David, and Solomon have been a part of my imaginative landscape as long as Darth Vader, Sam Spade, and the Gremlins have.Continue Reading

You are More than your Vagina: Lessons in Cissexism

Transmisogyny 3

by Melissa Brooks

Part I: Acknowledging your own cissexism

Although transsexuals have long existed, they have not long been at the forefront of public consciousness. While mainstream society is finally beginning to acknowledge and openly discuss trans issues, trans people remain very much marginalized and continue to be persecuted. Most cissexual  individuals—those of us whose gender identity matches the one society assigned us—have such a limited understanding of the trans experience because we grew up learning limited definitions of gender, biological sex, sexuality and sexual orientation that fail to account for trans people. As a result, even the best intentioned among us inadvertently harbor cissexist ideas—the belief that transsexual genders are less legitimate than, and mere imitations of, cissexual genders.Continue Reading

Re-imagining the Language of Sex, or: Squirting and its Synonyms

female ejaculation 2

 

I have always considered myself a “late bloomer.” In my early teens, I had a makeshift “camp boyfriend.” He was a blonde, lanky guy. Outside of the end-of-camp dance, he kissed my cheek too hard and too wetly while I sat on his lap, fidgeting over his erection. I did not enjoy my first real kiss until the end of high school.Continue Reading

Why You Should Talk to Your Healthcare Provider About Sex

Marion Foyelle drawings 1

by Fei Cai

Most of us have been there as teenagers.

Wearing a backless johnny, sitting on the way-too-high exam table, and trying not to make too much noise on that weird crinkly tissue paper they always put down for “sanitary” reasons. Your doctor or nurse practitioner stares you in the face and asks the dreaded question: “So… are you sexually active?”Continue Reading